Serving your Husband and Owning Your Femininity

If you've been my friend on Facebook over the past couple of years, you've probably seen a rant or two about modern-day relationships and women. Today, some women feel they are "empowered" if they forgo their femininity and ignore their womanly roles and privileges to be submissive to no man and no one. That's right women, we don't need men! Wow. What a sad thought.  In a family, this leaves children suffering- because they have a mother who can't fulfill their needs (because they are frantically trying- and failing-to do both the father AND mother roles) and a father who's value is totally dismissed, because the mother doesn't respect him and thinks she can do it just as well.

I need my husband. My husband has leadership over me. My husband has my respect and I try to be submissive to his wants and needs everyday (not without struggle I must admit.) 

What's more is that- get this revelation- my husband actually respects me and loves me more when I tend to his needs. For some reason, there is this false notion that if women "give into" satisfying, serving, and submitting to doing the things men like, it makes them weak and insuperior to men. I have to say I don't understand this. 

The most irritating thing about women is that we have this insane desire to create a scoreboard with our men and we FREAK OUT if the score seems uneven. If you are a wife, and you've never thought to yourself "I had to clean the whole house, do all the dishes, laundry, shopping and he JUST had to go to work!" You are definitely lying! That or you are a saint and I worship you!  We have this desire to be exactly equal with our husbands in give and take and it's so wrong! I guarantee you won't find many husbands who keep a tally- men just DO what needs to be done and suck it up. Sometimes my husband works his butt off and I have a smooth sailing week. Sometimes I'm a giant wreck and he holds it together. Marriage isn't about equal give and take all the time- it's about ALWAYS giving, no matter the situation. If I treat my husband with understanding and respect, it is almost always returned ten-fold. 

Today, some women have a few key lines that they stick to, to justify the disrespect of men. See if any sound familiar in your own thought process... 

1) "Men think they should be all powerful and that women are secondary." 

        - Biblically speaking, women are supposed to submit to their husbands. It's true! But the part that is always so conveniently left out is that MEN are FIRST to submit to God! Men are not masters, but servants to a Heavenly Father. Women are supposed to listen to and respect their men, but men are supposed to love women like Christ loves the church (with an all sacrificing and unconditional love and respect) in order to "earn" the right to that, so-to-speak. 

2) "Men(husbands) are PIGS who only want sex!"

        -Your husband wants you? He craves intimacy with his wife? He longs to be physically close to you? He desires you and finds your body beautiful... WHAT A PIG!!! Wives....stop complaining when your husband wants to be intimate with you!  Our husbands listen to us when we complain about mundane parts of our lives. They tell us their feelings when we beg- they are constantly trying to make us feel special. Sex and intimacy is a huge part of what makes men feel special, loved and accepted. We can just chalk it up to them being big ogres who only have physical demands, but let's face it- it's deeper than, that whether men or women want to admit it. 

3) "Femininity is weakness! Be strong! Be more like a man!" 

        -What some women don't care to see is that there is a huge amount of power in being a feminine woman! Women, by nature, are soft and sweet. We are sensual, caring, loving. God made woman to soften men and gave us all the feminine tools we need to do so. Use them! We have the power to create, sustain, and raise life! I realize some women are not blessed with fertility- but that doesn't rob them of their sweet feminine nature and ability to nurture. I must say, I've never seen a harsh, rough, and rugged woman with a happy and satisfied man. You catch more flies with honey than vinegar. And who ever said that being rough and tough was superior? I detest that notion.

4)  "I deserve the same roles and privileges as a man. Why should a man get something I can't?"

        - Listen up ladies, there are LOTS of things you will NEVER be able to have as a woman. You can blame society, science, history, or even nature. But the honest truth is that a woman can never naturally be a man, just as the opposite is the same. Men have responsibilities, anatomy, struggles, and privileges that we as women will never have. What makes this "fair" and "okay" is that we can say the same about our gender! If you want to be happy as a woman, start looking at the beauty in being a woman, and stop constantly thinking "yeah but WHAT ELSE?!" 

Since when has being a woman not been good enough? Since when is it only sufficient to be a woman AND a man? Why do we sometimes feel like taking from our husbands gives us more power? As a woman, I have been blessed with natural sensitivity and compassion. I have been blessed with the femininity and sensuality to intrigue my husband and make him feel loved with my heart, body, and soul. I have been blessed with roles in which I get to serve my husband and those around me. I have been empowered with strength to do a million things in one day. I have the right to raise children and teach them how to love. I get to respect my husband and be thankful that he is there to do the things that I cannot. 

I love the yin and yang of my relationship with my husband. We are a team. It is my responsibility to nurture and comfort. It is his to protect and provide. There are no rules to how we love and serve one another- but these are the cornerstones of our relationship and I couldn't be more grateful for them. 

  **edit** This original post targeted Feminists and I need to apologize for that! Thanks to great friends I realize it was wrong to attack a specific group of people- that was not my intention AT ALL! I made the mistake of viewing feminism as an abstract idea, instead of a group of individuals- which I now realize was silly and unfair. Apologies to anyone who was offended by the original post- I did not mean to spread hate by any means!

*If a man is threatening, forcing, or manipulating you to be submissive to him, this is abuse! Never serve a man who doesn't love, respect, and have your best interest at heart.